January 2012
164 posts
By the way, you only have a short time left to ask me anonymous questions. It’s back to normal in 2012.
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Happy New Year, Everyone
We’re home from the pier. That was a good outing, but the idea of braving that crowd as the New Year arrives sounded about as enjoyable as getting a colonoscopy during a Nickleback concert.
I was thinking about how to write about 2011 and I came to a simple summation: Parts of it sucked and parts of it were wonderful, just like every other year of my life. The thing that has changed since...
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December 2011
127 posts
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Sweet merciful Christ, the boys slept until 10 a.m. this morning. They may destroy everything they touch (that’s not much of an exaggeration), but they’re pretty good sleepers.
It helps that we phased out their nap about two weeks ago. Most toddlers jettison their nap around this age. They gave us an obvious sign that informed our decision: They simply stopped napping. (At first they...
frenchmommy said: i was at the gym reading a parenting magazine from Nov 2011 and boom! there’s thedaddycomplex. very cool.
Yay! That’s awesome.
If anyone else wants to read what frenchmommy did, you can find it at Redbook’s site.
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Mission: Responsible
Instead of braving the crowds, my wife and I are celebrating New Year’s Eve tonight with Tom Cruise and Simon Pegg. And maybe some Taco Bell.
Factoring in the babysitter, dinner and the rising cost of movie tickets, our date nights were getting a bit pricey. So, we’re doing a matinee of Ghost Protocol and a super-cheap dinner. In fact, I’m thinking about smuggling turkey...
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Can I tell you? I’m kinda sick of all this Portlandia shit on my dash.
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Anonymous asked: How much work should a stay at home mom do? If the father works 40+ hrs a week in a semi-physical job, and the mother takes care of a single child. Should the mothers responsibilities include housework (dishes, cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc.)? Or is taking car of a child more than all the housework plus the full-time job combined?
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parentingthewayweseeit:
Please every one, PLEASE, pray for Rebecca and her family especially for little baby Edythe through this extremely tough time.
Seconded. I would add, if you’re not the praying type, send good thoughts/vibes/energy their way.
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The Baby Stalker
My wife had a bout of insomnia the other night and watched SuperNanny until 3 a.m. I woke to a whole new set of parenting tools. I guess that’s more productive than when I have insomnia and watch old episodes of Kolchak: The Night Stalker on Netflix. Nothing on that show would help me parent unless I was raising an alligator baby. Or maybe a haunted suit of armor. Or a Hindu demon.
...
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johnness replied to your link: Yon Anon Is On For The Rest Of 2011
No Anonymous option for me. Could be I’m dumb.
No, it appears I was the dumb one. I forgot to save the settings. Now, anon is on. But, now I also know one of the anonymous questions might be from you. Huzzah!
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Yon Anon Is On For The Rest Of 2011 →
I’ve switched on the “ask anonymously” function and will leave it on for the entirety of 2011. If you’ve ever wanted to ask an embarrassing question, offer an observation or just rant about how much you dislike my hygiene, take advantage of this opportunity. Last time I did this, the questions I got didn’t seem very anon-worthy. So while you’re free to remain...
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donnahansen asked: I love your blog. Men with babies are HOT! Enough sucking up. I need your help. Seriously. My amazing, sweet, charming, brillant 16-month-old girl loves to throw her food, laugh in my face, then smear her food caked hands in my hair when I bend over to pick up her amusements. I am sure this is a sign of severe intelligence but it is beating me down. Your insights are welcomed.
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I'm Like The Stephen Hawking Of Toddler Bedtime...
Let me refresh your memory about something. For nearly a month, I’ve been placing a row of toys on the boys’ dresser at bedtime. I tell them if they get out of bed and goof off after I leave the room — if I have to return to their room for any reason other than an emergency — they lose at least two of the toys. I just want to report that this tactic has worked steadily since I...
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2011 In Review: 7 Parenting Controversies That... →
Boy, it was a big year for parenting news. This breakdown of the year’s biggest parenting controversies offers explanations of how each story might have affected your life.
Seriously though, does anybody remember that Tiger Mother lady anymore?
(via atomicmom)
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Baby's First Curse Word | MSNBC.com →
A talking baby doll sold at Toy R Us appears to drop the b word. And I don’t mean “booby.” I wrote once before about how I thought the boys’ little phonics toy bus sounded like it was unleashing the grandest of all curse words. That turned out to be a messily recorded version of the word “fox.” But I’ve also seen enough evidence of disgruntled Disney...
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Xmas Unwrapped
I don’t have kids anymore. They’re now “bad guys,” according to them anyway. That’s what they decided while playing with their new toys after an awesome Xmas morning. The bad guys spent most of their playtime running from a T-Rex through a wasteland of wrapping paper and escaping in a boat… I don’t know. It was their game. I didn’t question it.
I...
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“Honey! It’s a Christmas miracle!”
– Me just now upon finding a bottle a Maker’s Mark in the liquor cabinet
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Boone was misbehaving just now, so I faked a call to the North Pole. I told him the hold music was Mannheim Steamroller. It worked.
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frenchmommy asked: i have kids. i understand. clothing is the antichrist according to my twin sons- but how are you able to post anything about the kids concerning nudity or partial nudity without everyone jumping all over your back about it?
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We watched Rise of the Planet of the Apes the other night. In it, primitive creatures quickly grow intelligent and fight their oppressors… Make it toddlers instead of apes and it could have taken place at my house.
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For the curious, we didn’t end up hitting the road until 3 p.m., but that was mostly because of us, not the boys. And so, of course, we hit traffic. The guys were great, though. We’ve trained them since birth to be awesome road-trippers. I even let Boone make the mixtape for the drive. It was three hours of the theme from The Backyardigans.
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mediocremommy asked: I just love the shit out of your blog. Happy Holidays.
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By the time you read this, we should be on the road to our place up north where we will celebrate Xmas with my in-laws. Of course, if past departures are any indicator, by the time you read this, we’ll probably be still packing our bags with dirty laundry and pleading with the boys to put on some pants.
There may also be a poop accident.
And it may come from me.
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oursarah said: Don’t knock The Young Ones.
Never. I love that show.
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Downy Fresh Breath
My wife has a moment at least once a week in which she cries out, “I’m sick of folding laundry!” She then longingly describes the day when we won’t have a load of dirty clothes that need washing or clean clothes that need folding. I tell her, with all the love I have, that day will come right after Angeln Saddleback pigs take flight and every home is bequeathed a silver...
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The December S@HMMY.com Is Up →
The December installment of S@HMMY.com has been unveiled. The site features funny parenting stories from regular and guest contributors. This month’s issue includes a Q&A with actor and dad Matt Corboy (of Modern Family and The Descendants) and posts from Tumblr moms donkeysalright and crazedinthekitchen. Oh, and yours truly is represented in the Man Cave by the latest episode of...
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The Good Men Project & Feminism →
Hugo Schwyzer, editor and contributor for The Good Men Project, resigned last night over moral differences stemming from founder Tom Matlack’s criticism of feminism. On his site, he wrote about why he quit and offered his rebuttal that The Good Men Project refused to run. (The Good Men Project is also on Tumblr, by the way.)
I’ve joked a couple of times about how I’m not sure...
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Moms With Part-Time Jobs Are Happier →
Let’s, for a minute, put aside the age-old complaint that parenting is work. A study published in the Journal of Family Psychology finds that moms who work part-time jobs are more happy than stay-at-home moms and moms that work full time. The study also found those with part-time gigs were just as involved in their child’s education as stay-at-home moms. And both the full-time and...
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Study Finds Cocaine On 92% Of UK's Public Baby... →
Researchers found cocaine residue on 9 out of 10 changing stations in the UK.
A nation of coked out babies. This explains so much. So, so much.
Like The Young Ones. And Tony Blair.
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My Life Was Like A Movie And Not In A Good Way
We joined some friends for dinner last night. Their son and our boys are all friends. We went to a big open air mall full of stores normal people can’t afford to shop in. Our plan was to go to Giggles N’ Hugs, a relatively nice restaurant that also has a large play area so kids can be set loose like a troupe of Aripuanã marmosets. But, the eatery was rented out for a birthday party, so...
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The Mommy Dialogues.com
ilovemazzy-zephyr:
Hey guys! Please help me to spread the word about a new website that I am happy to be a part of, themommydialogues.com! Our site features moms from all walks of life, with twins, newborns, older children and everything in between. It offers tidbits of wisdom, product reviews, recipes and DIY. We try to focus more on natural parenting and will feature stories on...
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One Of My Greatest Parenting Fears Realized
On Sunday, we took the boys out to lunch and at one point Boone had to go pee. So, I took him the the bathroom and we commandeered the large back stall. A few more people entered the restroom and soon it was full. Then, out of nowhere and with crystal clear diction, Boone says, “I don’t want you to hit me.”
I’ve literally never even raised a hand to either of my kids, so I...
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My wife showed the boys the cat gif. They’ve been watching it and belly laughing for close to 20 minutes. Good to see they inherited my schadenfreude.
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